Love and Communication —Relationship Corner with Eddie Schwaggs

“We have two ears and one mouth, so we should listen more than we say”
Zeno of citium. Communication is a key part of all forms of relationship and a very core part of romantic relationships.

Communication goes beyond merely talking to your lover, it involves revealing your feelings in any way possible to your lover and understanding his or hers too.

Communication is explaining your needs and wants to your partner and hearing his or hers too, so that you can work together to achieve them. Communication is a two—way lane.

Love doesn’t exist in a vaccum nor communication exists in a vacuum. Two lovers are two people with different backgrounds, experiences, ideologies, philosophies and personalities, communication is the essential ingredient that comes to play when there is “Clash of Wills”.

Every individual has his own style of communication, since relationships involves two parties, they should come together and find a style that will favor them the most. Though styles differ for different couples, there are some elements that will aid smooth communication :

1. Listen

No matter the tone of your discussion, no matter what the problem is, listen to your partner. Let your partner express himself or herself without distractions. Avoid interrupting or distracting your partner.

This way, you will know his or her needs, worries, pains, joy, and all that makes them. Don’t even let your thoughts distract you, when your partner wants to talk to you, give him or her your lover, your mind, soul and body.

2. Communicate clearly

Share your feelings and emotions and thoughts clearly with your partner. Avoid leaving your partner to speculate, let them know exactly how you feel. This way, there won’t be misconceptions. Talk about how you feel and what you want. Let him or her know how what s/he does affect you. Always accept responsibility for your actions and words.

3. Never Assume

Never speculate what your partner is saying, try to find our what your partner mean by their actions and words. Don’t assume anything, find out the truth and act accordingly. Assumptions destroy communication.

4. Be Empathetic to your partner

Try to put yourself in your partner’s shoes, try to understand why they do the things they do. This will allow you understand them better and when you communicate with them, you will know how to handle issues and things involving their emotions and intentions.

5. Give positive vibes

Share optimistic feelings with your partner, compliment them, encourage them, believe in them. This will allow your partner to communicate with you frequently and openly because he or she knows you won’t condemn them instead you will help them through anything.

6. He doesn’t want to fight

You always remember that your partner does not want to fight with you. Your relationship is not a war zone and is more important than being right. Know when to avoid arguments and when to concede defeat. Let the sleeping dogs lie, don’t bring the past into your current issue. You are lovers not enemies, always remember that.

7. Watch for Non—Verbal Signs

Be conscious about your partner’s non-verbal signs. Sometimes your partner won’t communicate with you with words but with body language like –

I. Tone — An aggressive tone shows that your partner’s emotions is getting involved in the argument or S/he feels S/he is not heard.

II. Eye contact — lack of eye contact shows your partner is not interested in the discussion or is ashamed about talking about it.

There are more signs, just study the body language of your partner and try to reach out to him or her to fix whatever the problem is. Also be conscious of your body language.

8. Be honest

Finally, be open and honest with your partner. Shy away from lying to your loved one. Let him or her know the truth at all times.

With these tips, you are sure to have a beautiful communication in your relationship. A long-lasting relationship is built on communication, let that be your watch word. Don’t forget to like, comment and share, this has been Relationship Corner.