“The more we are filled with thoughts of lust the less we find true romantic love.”
— Douglas Horton
Love and lust are often confused to be the same thing. They both spark feelings of connection to our partner. Lust is based on physical attraction but love is both the physical and emotional connection. Many people consider lust as love because they feel the only the way to prove to someone they love them, is through sex. Also lust has some similarities with love like physical connection and feelings of excitement and happiness, but lust doesn’t give that emotional connection. When you feel lust for someone, you do not care about the person, you do not crave long inexhaustible talks with your partner. You do not want spend time after sex, cuddling or having pillow fights. You just want to be sexual intimate with your partner.
Sometimes, lust can lead to love, but it is a rarity. Lust often times leads to breakup when one or both partners find out that what exist them is lust not love, this because lust is mostly based sex and sensual habits and it will come to a point in the relationship when there is no purpose or spice, or a deep link between the two hearts.
People struggle to differentiate the two, here are tips that shows you when you are in love with your partner or you feel lust for him or her.
1. You are not friends
If you feel lust for someone, you might not be friends with the person, you might not know who they are, their flaws, their weaknesses, what makes smile or sad. When you are in love, you see these things and still choose to stay with the person. Lust blinds your partner inadequacies and paint him or her in a perfect line. You are not necessarily friends with the one you feel lust for.
2. Sex is driving force
If sex is what drives the relationship, then it’s not a relationship built with/on love. It’s clearly lust. When all you think about your partner, is how sexy his body is, or how much you want to see her naked. When you dream only about having sex with him or her without thinking of building a future with your partner, it is lust.
3. It’s physical
When all that matters to both of you is how you look. Your appearance matters a lot to your partner because you want to look sexy all the time, or hot all the time. Appearance matters too in relationships built in love but it’s should be basis to get together, you shouldn’t be worried about looking your best all the time. Your partner must see you when look like you went swimming with all your clothes on. Lust feeds on appearance.
4. You don’t have deep talks
When your talks are shallow and without direction, it has to do with lust. You don’t talk about the future, your dreams, weakness, aspirations, you just talk about how her pant is black or how often you visit the gym to have those rock hard abs, then it’s lust.
5. You don’t challenge yourselves
One of the beautiful things of relationship is that, our partner makes us better version of ourselves. Love tends to brings out the best in us. It challenges us to be unique, strong and beautiful. Lust doesn’t have any business with challenge and all of that, it focus on feeding from you till there is nothing left.
Relationship must be built on love, with love and in love for it to grow and yield bountiful fruits. Love makes any relationship intense, beautiful and amazing. Lust on the hand, removes all the emotional connection and sex is just bland. This has been Relationship Corner with Eddie Schwaggs