“Your love is like the lamp in the window that guides me home through the darkest night.”
Have you seen the girl you really like and words and actions fail you? You don’t know how to approach her and because she is beautiful and amazing, you know other guys also have her in mind. Here are ways to win her heart
I. Before you know her
If she is someone you don’t really know but admire from afar, or you have met through friends or colleagues or family, there are things you need to put in place for her to consider you.
1. Strike a conversation
Though the earth may tremble and the air may feel heavier, though your mind may seem blank and your body tremble, walk up to her and say something. It might be a comment on the weather or something about the environment. What you say doesn’t matter, what matters is the fact that you spoke to her. She will get the hint that you have special interest in her.
2. Purse lightly
After she is atleast comfortable with you over time, you can declare your interest early so that you don’t end up in the friend’s zone. Though don’t go saying things like “I love you ” or “I want to marry you “, just let her know you have interest in her, that you like her. Your main focus though, should be to build a connection with her, a friendship that exist between lovers, get to understand her and know who she is and open yourself gradually to her.
3. Compliment her
Especially when you first interacted with her, pay her an honest compliment. At the right moments pay her sincere compliments from your heart. Like “you look really nice in that gown”, “I love what you did with your hair” (women love it when you notice the efforts they make to look good, Nigerian women most especially particularly love it when you compliment their newly made hair).
4. Be creative
Find ways to wow her. Be brave and intentional about it, remember girls love brave guys. Do amazing things or take her to amazing places, or buy her things different from her exes or anyone else had ever gotten for her. Think outside the box and go out of your way to make her feel special and loved.
5. Be her personal comedian
Make her laugh her heart out. If you are not funny with words, be funny in character. One of the ways to a girl’s heart, is to make that heart happy and joyous when you are around.
6. Be clean
Hygiene is very important in wooing that special one. Don’t go smelling like you live in a garbage site and expect her to like you or you come close to her with your breathe smelling like rotten eggs, she will run a way from you before you spell “IT”. Take care of yourself, your body should be clean and fresh. Buy a deodorant if you have a bad body odor or you sweat a lot, use perfume lightly but not to hide your odor as research has shown, the odor and cologne will mix and form a more repulsive odor. Dress neatly and smart, eat well and cultivate good habits.
7. She should never doubt you like her
Prove that you really like her. Find out about her, talk to her, try to bond with her, do things with her (but not every time, so she won’t feel pressurized). Don’t let her doubt for a second, your feelings towards her, and let her understand that you are not lusting after her or after something else. Don’t strive to get sexually involved too soon
II. When you know her
After you both have become familiar with each other. Then it’s time to take things up a notch
8. Flirt with her
Tease her playfully, touch her not too much but just enough to send currents of electricity coursing through her. You two should have special tease names for each other. When you talk to her, look out her mouth then her eyes then her mouth, research has proven that this will make her subconsciously want to kiss you. Hold her hands sometimes. Flirt mercilessly with her.
9. Still compliment and respect her
Compliments shouldn’t end. Tell her she is looking beautiful today, tell her she is smart, compliment her. Respect her. Respect her wishes, desires and personality.
10. Be sincere
Let all that you do and say come from your heart, don’t play hanky panky with her heart. Let her know that everything you tell her, it’s the truth and it’s from the purest of motives. Don’t say her hair is beautiful whereas it makes her look like a chimpanzee, instead loving tell her that her will look better if she does another style. Always be sincere to her.
11. Be dependable
She should be able to trust and rely on your judgement and on you. She know that your no is no and yes is yes. She should trust your intellects on various issues and be free to discuss anything that bothers her with you because she knows it won’t get out. She should feel safe with at every point in time with you because you always protect her emotionally and physically.
12. Know her
If there was a pop quiz and the questions were based on her, you score 70% and above on the quiz. You should know who she is and what makes her tick, and don’t stop at what you know, always try to find out more about her. Remember every one is a book and each day we discover new things about each other.
III. Finally getting her heart
After stage I and II, then use these last stages to deal the deal so to speak.
13. Be one with her
Share in her emotions, be there for her in good times and bad times. Be with her whenever she needs you to be.
14. Be very playful
Play with her. Playing with her will deepen your bond, pave way for her to be free with you and open the doors to her heart for only you to come in. Tickle her mercilessly, play with her hair, plait it even. Play catch with her, just be fun and exciting around her.
15. Make her feel like a queen
If she is the queen of your heart, treat her like such. Treat her like she is the most amazing person in the world, pamper her mildly, be chivalrous, take care of her and grant some of her needs.
16. Communicate effectively with her
Be a great listener and communicate with her frequently. Send her texts In the morning to remind her of your love, at night to make her dream of you and talk to her during the day, so she knows you care about her. Communicate your emotions clearly to her and never let your emotions (especially negative emotions) color your words.
17. Ask her to date you
After you have done all these, and you sure she has fallen for you, ask her on date, tell her you love her and then ask her out.
All these tips are useless, if you are all doing all the work. Make sure after making the first move (as my friend will say, “Men are hunters”), she shows interest by also texting you, wanting to hang out with you, seeking you out amongst your friends among others before you continue. If she says no from inception or after you have declare your feelings, try a little more not too much though tho, so you won’t seem desperate and if she insists, let her go. Lastly, every love story is unique, these tips will guide you however things may pan out differently, fall in love and have fun in love, for love is the light of our existence. This has been Relationship Corner with Eddie Schwaggs.