Whenever we hear the words ” I need space ” from our loved ones, we experience feelings of hurt, anger, and pain. You assume that your lover wants to end the relationship or they no longer enjoy your company, though 50% of time, it means your lover wants to end things with you, but it can also means your partner needs time to meditate, redefine him/her self and come back to you a better person.
Giving each other space in a relationship, is not necessarily a bad thing instead it helps your relationship grow because it gives you both time to miss each other. Especially when one or both of you is becoming clingy, it then becomes imperative for you guys to take time off each other, doing things without each other. It is beautiful when you both hang out most of time and make unforgettable memories but if you are both in each other’s faces all the time, you both are bound to begin to get tired of your company and the relationship will suffer it.
You both should recognize when you need space from each other, especially when either of you feels choked or the relationship gets boring. Most a times, one partner often feels choked and doesn’t know how to tell the other without hurting him or her or without the other feeling like the partner wants to break up. It’s better to ask your partner what he or she means by giving each other space when he or she tells you those words. It is normal to feel hurt or pained when your partner tells you he or she needs space but how you handle it determines whether your relationship lives or dies. You can begin by calming your nerves, then asking questions like “Does it mean break up?” Or “does it mean you both need to get out of each other’s hair for a while?” If means the latter, then “for how long”, when the duration is known, “then what are the rules” these questions will help put things in perspective and help you both sort things out. Some times, the idea of space won’t be so formal that you both need discuss it, it might be telling your partner you want to travel to another city to visit a friend or spending few days with friends and family only.
Giving each other space does wonders for both you and your lover. It helps you both retain your sense of individuality. You both can have time to chase your own interests and hobbies. You both have time to do you and also have tons to tell each other when you both finally see. It also gives both you and your lover time to miss each other and crave each other. It gives you both space to value the relationship and each other. It also helps you rediscover yourself, your relationship shouldn’t be the only thing that makes you, your relationship is part of your life but you should also have a life asides your relationship.
For the space between you to yield positive results, you must obey the rules. Always remember it’s a positive thing, try to have fun with yourself and also with family and friends. Obey the rules you both set, if there should be no incessant texting or calls, then oblige. There should be a stipulated time for the space to end, and it helps makes things easier. When all the space is over, evaluate what you both learnt from the space, and don’t forget to prove to your partner that you love and miss him or her when you are reunited.
Giving each other space can help your relationship grow and help you both fall deeper in love with each other. It gives room for your relationship to strive, wounds to be healed and self esteem to increase. Space is healthy for any relationship. This has been Relationship Corner with Eddie Schwaggs
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