Kingsley Okonkwo, a Lagos-based clergyman, has encouraged women to define their relationships with males to avoid wasting time explicitly. During a sermon, he encouraged women to ask essential questions early on.
“Women ask the best questions when they are not in love. Once a woman is in love, she doesn’t know the question to ask. If you are a woman, one of the things you need to know about relationship is that it is important to define relationships, make sure you know what you are in,” Okonkwo said.
He noted that many women feel afraid or ashamed to clarify their relationships, often leading to problems.
“Always get ‘what’ clear. I tell ladies, don’t be available for dating, be available for marriage. Someone will say, ‘Will I not date before marriage?’ We date with purpose, there is an end point. Don’t just date for dating’s sake.”
The cleric emphasized that many women blame men for broken hearts, but the responsibility often lies in how they approach relationships.
“Many women go about saying the man broke my heart. He didn’t break your heart. You broke your heart. A man came and said ‘I want to date you,’ and you said ‘yes,’ and he dated you for seven years. Has he lied?” Okonkwo explained.
He concluded by reminding women not to enter into indefinite relationships. “Don’t sign up for those indefinite relationships,” he said.
