Toke Makinwa, a renowned actress and media personality, recently shared on her Toke Moments podcast, I Am Growing Up, Not Old, that if she had remarried after her divorce, she believes she would have ended up divorced again.
Toke Makinwa opened up about turning 40 and how she once feared being single and childless at this age, but has now come to terms with it.
Toke Makinwa said, “Regret is so exhausting. Get comfortable with your truth. The hardest thing I could say to myself is that I’m 40, single, and childless. I said it, and I did not die. That used to make me almost tear up. I used to feel like, ‘Oh my God, how am I 40 and I don’t have a child, single and lonely?’”
“If I’m completely honest with you guys, if I had gotten married again, I would be divorced again. Because the lessons just never stop. I’m grateful for the journey, I’m grateful for where I am, I’m grateful that I’m 40. Life is perspective. I could look at it like, ‘Oh my God, I’m 40, and I don’t have a child, I don’t have a husband. People have passed me.’ But I can look at it as, ‘I’m 40, I’m a boss, I’ve built an empire. I’m one of the most resounding voices in Africa. I have the love of family, I’m in great health, I love what I do, I’m not waking up miserable. I have the right amount of people that are supposed to be in my life.’ Sometimes, you need to sit with your truth. And once you sit with your truth, they say, you cannot shame the shameless.”
“Once you can tell yourself these uncomfortable truths—I’m not always going to be childless, I’m not always going to be without a spouse or a partner if I so desire it. What I desire, desires me, too. This is where I am. This is what it is right now. The moment you can tell yourself those ugly truths, they become beautiful. Sometimes, I’m happy and lucky that I get to experience life this way and learn my lessons this way. Eventually, when the person that’s made for me comes along, I know that I’m more mature, I know that I’m in a better headspace, and I know what it’s like to be in a relationship.”
Toke Makinwa was previously married to businessman Maje Ayida, with their marriage coming to an end in 2017.
Despite rumors in November 2024 suggesting she had married her longtime partner Farouk Umar, Toke Makinwa quickly put those reports to rest, clarifying that they were just friends and that any wedding speculations were simply part of her Thanksgiving celebration.
