R&B star SZA has candidly shared how severe anxiety made her doubt her place on the Grand National Tour alongside Kendrick Lamar, despite co-headlining the global event.
Speaking with Chappell Roan for Interview magazine, SZA revealed:
“Every time I had to go on stage, every time I had to get on a carpet, I’d have full-on panic attacks. I used to not show up to something because it was like, ‘I’m never going to win. No one cares that I’m here. Why would I go?'”
She admitted she initially feared fans were there just to see Kendrick Lamar.
“Same thing with the Kendrick tour. Everybody’s going to see Kendrick. I don’t even know if I have anything to show these people that’s exciting and new.”
However, the “Saturn” singer said she has been learning to overcome those thoughts through spiritual growth and studying what she calls the “laws of magic.”
“Now it’s just like, ‘F*** it. I don’t have anything else to do, and I want to see where this door is going to lead.’ I want to walk through the door. I want to see what happens in the uncertainty.”
SZA also reflected on her decade-long friendship with Lizzo, recalling how they bonded on tour in 2013.
“One day we were on the same tour, and I was like, ‘We’re about to drive out to Lake Michigan, do you want to come?’ And she was like, ‘Yeah, let’s go.’ And then we just got drunk and hung out.”
She said their bond remained strong as their careers blossomed, with Lizzo recently joining her on stage during a performance in Inglewood.
Despite her fame, SZA also confessed she still gets starstruck—especially around Beyoncé.
“I can’t speak unless she wants to speak, in my brain, because I don’t want to bother her… She’s a masterclass on poise, grace, artistry, beauty and kindness.”
