Popular Nigerian dancer Kaffy Shafau has shared candid insights into why her marriage to Joseph Ameh ended, admitting she entered into it without fully understanding the responsibilities and complexities involved.
Speaking during a conversation with media personality Chude Jideonwo, Kaffy reflected on her personal experience and broader societal issues surrounding marriage, stressing that many people are simply not prepared for what it truly demands.
The dancer, who officially ended her marriage in January 2022, explained that the kind of guidance most people receive from their parents is often insufficient to equip them for married life.
“I was not educated enough for marriage and a lot of us aren’t,” she said. “Our parents are not preparing us enough; living through their eyes is not enough education about marriage.”
Kaffy argued that marriage should be treated as a serious life commitment that requires structured learning and preparation—similar to other critical aspects of life that demand training and certification.
She questioned why society makes it relatively easy to obtain a marriage certificate compared to other processes like getting a driver’s license, despite the profound impact marriage has on individuals and society at large.
According to her, deeper measures should be introduced before couples are allowed to marry, including mental health assessments, drug testing, and structured relationship education.
“It is a special course that needs to be taken,” she said. “We can’t have a society that issues you a marriage certificate easier than a driver’s license… it’s inside this home that all the ills of society are being built.”
Kaffy also emphasized the importance of mental health awareness in relationships, suggesting that couples should undergo proper psychological evaluation and therapy before marriage.
“There’s a lot of mental health situations and assessments that need to go on. It’s not only counselling… there should be mental evaluation of the couple,” she added.
She further proposed a structured program—potentially lasting up to a year—focused on human behavioral sciences to better prepare couples for marriage and parenthood.
Her remarks have sparked conversations online, with many agreeing that marriage requires more intentional preparation, while others debate the practicality of implementing such rigorous pre-marital requirements.
